Dear Crystal,
It's been exactly one week you left us. Grandpa and Mummy miss you so much.
Still can't believe you left us suddenly, it happened all so quickly in one day. In the morning you still ran to me in the morning to greet, looking at me and wagging that cute fluffy tail of yours. And at night no matter how come I tell you how much I love you, how much I don't want you to left, don't give up, stay with us... In the end you still had to go. I still remember you were lying on the floor and when I started cleaning you, you tried to wag your tail and made some noise. Its not till I was half done I realised you were quiet. When I went to your head, you didn't move. I kept shouting Crystal Crystal. I kept patting you. There was no response.
Keep wishing you leaving us was just a dream and I will quickly wake up from this horrible nightmare. Sometimes it doesn't feel like you left, it still feel like you are at home waiting for us to come home. Every time when I go into our room and see that you and your bed isn't there is the times that I know its not a dream, its true you've left us. Every morning I always get to see you next to me, but now all I see is nothing on the floor.
Keep thinking over and over why did you suddenly don't want us anymore. It's not till you left that I realised there is so much stuff I said I will do with you, things I will do with you, places I will take you.
Your grandpa starting crying at work when he was chopping chicken cause it was only a few days ago we were chopping chicken for you. I will never forget how a picky eater you are. Getting unwell when we buy you cheap, normal chicken. Will only eat free range chicken or organic chicken. Your chicken was even more expensive than the dinner we have that's for two. But its these annoying things you do that make you extra special.
In college the other day I went to the deli counter to get a chicken salad sandwich. Because you like eating bread, chicken, cucumber and lettuce. When I was in class eating, I started crying. All I have in my head was that silly cute face you have when you are eating something you love.
Misa only tried to look for you the first day you left, seeing this lets me see how good it is to be so small and innocent, not understanding anything at such young age. But sometimes I think, lots of people say dogs can see ghosts and spirits, maybe she isn't upset like us because she can see you, you are with us.
I don't know why, but we have this feeling the vets could of helped you more or maybe slowed down the process or lessen the pain. I really didn't want to take up the offer from the vet to put you to sleep that late afternoon. I don't understand how you went in there fine and come back out saying you need to be put to sleep. You hated that place and I know you would be happier leaving and going home. They said you were weak, but you dashed to the car and jumped up. So happy to go home.
Even though you were getting weaker that night, you still tried to go upstairs to our room. When I took phone out and said I want to take a picture, your face was so happy. Your eyes got all big and round and look so cute. How can a happy looking dog suddenly leave that night?
You really are a wonderful dog. Even though it's your last night, you still act all cute wanting to put your head on my lap. Got all annoyed when we stopped massaging you. Look all awake and cute when I took pictures, Really want to thank you for leaving such beautiful pictures for us. You really are the best family anyone can ever ask for.
Really think you are silly, only three days left and it was your 10th birthday. We already told you we will buy you a big steak for a birthday treat. Or maybe we are the silly ones. Monday was your favourite day of the week cause its grandpa and mummy's day off. You are always so happy and expect us to take you out. Always run to the door when we get up and put our jackets on. Park on a good day. A drive about in the car on a rainy day. You were always so excited on Monday and so hyper. Maybe that's why you decided you want to leave on your favourite day, so both of us can spend your last night together.
Really thank you for giving me a chance to have you as my daughter. Having you as part of our family was amazing. There was good and bad times. Now it's all turned to lovely memories. Really wished you let me spoil you for a bit longer. Feel like you've not enjoyed life enough.
I love you loads Crystal. Will never forget you. Hope your next life will be even better than this one. Hope we can meet again in the next life.
R.I.P.
Crystal Fung
07.11.2003 - 04.11.2013
